BAHRAIN
QUALIFYING
“I just want to see close racing. And good racing. And somebody to take the fight Red Bull all year long. That’ll do me.”
“A Formula One car is a bit like a weather vane.”
“If the track’s been too hot for your tyres, they’ve been turning to chewing gum before the end of the lap.”
“It’s all quite limited now as to what you can do, other than the nut that’s holding the steering wheel, basically.”
“We can look up, he’s [Gunther Steiner] coming into our world of television, isn’t he? […] He’ll find the TV rules somewhat different, language-wise, than “sitting on the pit wall” rules.
“140,000 square metres of run-off, this track, all of which will delete your lap time if you use too much of it.”
Martin: “Looked like he was wrestling an octopus.”
[…]
Crofty: “Ever wrestled an octopus? Ever wanted to wrestle an octopus?”
Martin: “I just imagine it’d be quite… busy.”
Crofty: “Trippy? Never know which leg’s coming at you next?”
Martin: “Nearly as dangerous as dropping a Formula One car.”
Martin: “I’ve never been to the desert and been so cold for so long as this.”
Crofty: “Last night when we sent you out to a couple of corners it looked like you’d gone to the Nurburgring in October.”
Martin: “I was hiding behind a generator housing at one point to stay… only my tabard saved me, I think, last night.”
Crofty: “And while you were doing that Ted is just strolling around in shorts like it’s the middle of the summer, eh Ted?”
Ted: “Definitely – it’s not cold enough for trousers yet, what are you talking about?”
“It seems to me that Mercedes, the one Aston Martin remaining, and the two McLarens are probably looking at each other at this point – and probably wondering what on earth Nico Hulkenberg is going to pull out of the bag.”
(Alonso doesn’t go out in the first runs in Q3)
“Probably out on a deckchair somewhere, isn’t he, out the back.”
RACE
Coming soon…
SAUDI ARABIA
Martin did not commentate in Saudi Arabia; Karun Chandhok commentated instead.
AUSTRALIA
QUALIFYING
“I was told when I was young when they take your appendix out they use it for the bits in marmalade. I believed it at the time!”
“That could have been a massive accident. I’ve seen Michael Schumacher upside down in that gravel trap once.”
“Did you notice the birds settling back down on the track as soon as there weren’t any cars out there?”
“Easily flat out as long as you still have all the wheels on the car.”
RACE
Martin: “Did he [Schumacher] have you off on purpose [in Adelaide 1994]?”
Damon: “What do you think? You’re supposed to be the expert.”
Martin: “Almost certainly!”
[…]
Martin: “Thank you from my perspective, because it put me on the podium!”
“It always makes me nervous walking across a rear jack like that, because if it came up… you can imagine it’d hurt.”
(to Dude Perfect)
“Have you not got a ball or an office chair or something to do a sketch on the grid?”
“Let’s do a Marty’s Random Person… that’s Louise! That’s not a Marty’s Random Person, that’s Louise [Goodman], I used to work with her at ITV!”
“You’re [Ricciardo] going to be lonely at the back! Zhou Guanyu’s in the pit lane, no Logan Sargeant […] you’re going to have to dodge the confetti of carbon fibre.”
(to Sainz)
“They had to cut three little holes or something in you to get your appendix.”
“Adrenalin is a wonderful thing.”
“To finish first, first you must finish.”
“They’re just starting to release the reins a bit. Not that I’ve ever ridden a horse. […] Give me 1,000 horsepower, I love it. Give me one horse, it’d frighten the life out of me.”
“Albon came in on lap 6. He’ll get the fleet operators’ award if he keeps running the tyres that long.”
(McLaren swap Piastri behind Norris)
“I doubt there’s a box to tick on the to-do list today of “pleasing the fans”.”
(Leclerc gets close to the wall)
“That’s all right. A miss is as good as a mile.”
“He [Sainz] cost a couple of kilos in weight including his appendix.”
“There’s a lot of World Championships standing as spectators today.”
“Don’t know if they have royal rovers back in Spain or whatever they’re called.”
“That’s a really good sporting story.”
“Nothing against Red Bull, but F1 needed this today.”